Offensiveness at Defcon 4
I'm sure many of you have been wondering...is Keith going to forget all of his emo ex-girlfriend bullshit and start talking about what's important? That them thar election whatnot that happened recently? You want to read about what I think abou the election? What I think about the candidates? What I think about America's right and left political wings? Fine. You fucking asked for it... only, I'm not going to talk about what you probably assume that I would...President Bush and his dictatorship and all the horrific blah blah blah let's all hate the right wing like we always do... No actually, on the contrary, I'm going to talk about liberals. I'm going to let you know exactly what I think of anyone who thinks that they swing the left wing, and that they're going to have to fight Bush and our government in order to make things better for everyone.
You're an idiot and I hate you. Here's why...
1. I hate you for thinking you ever had a chance. WERE YOU EVEN THINKING??? Did you even CONSIDER what has happened in the last ten years, and what has even happened in the last six months? Our country, yes OUR COUNTRY, that thing you talk about as if it has thrown its collective political weight behind your liberal riteousness, almost impeached a man a few years ago for having sex outside of his marriage. WE ALMOST IMPEACHED HIM for something THAT ISN"T AGAINST THE LAW. Fast forward a few years. A president lies to all of America, he then admits he was wrong...he then continues with his decision after the apology as if nothing happened. AND WE ALL SWALLOWED IT WHOLE. Now you can say, that you didn't, that you fought it, that you went to the protests like I did. But implicitly, you fucking loved it, we all loved it. We were outraged, we yelled alot, hell some of us may have even put up STICKERS (GASP!) or maybe tried to get some grassroots movements together. Wow, we sure did make a difference.(See Section 2 for further ranting on this subject--direct action) We didn't impeach him, hell, we didn't even slap the man on the wrist. No instead we went 'no war in iraq' and then got some celebrities to jiggle their breasts and say 'no war in iraq.' After all of this, after one of the greatest blunders, some would even say crimes, in US history, we continue on as if nothing had happened. Sure, you may very well be outraged, and yes, he did lie, yes he is a criminal, but wait....oooooooh waaaaaiiiiit. AMERICA DOESN"T CARE. WAKE UP YOU FUCKING SHIT EATING LIBERAL. YOU ARE NOT AMERICA, YOU DO NOT SPEAK FOR EVERYONE, YOUR RIGHTEOUS RHETORIC IS BULLSHIT. We all saw across the country, people voted for Kerry, of course they did, they wanted to get rid of Bush...but, most of those votes for Kerry were in the NorthEast Corridor and the west coast. Most of middle america loves bush, they love the bombs stuffed in their butt, because they've forgot what shitting is like and frankly that's a fucking miracle. SO YOU, IN ALL OF YOUR EGOTISTICAL ASSHOLE SOAPBOXING, ASSUME THAT YOUR OPINION MATTERS MORE THAN THAT OF THESE PEOPLE(see section three for a GIANT rant on this) You aren't fundamentalist christian, you aren't some redneck confederate throwback, you may not be a total asshole. But you are an idiot. Because like it or not, these people are America, they are the ones who benefit and hurt the most from all of this political hoohaa. It is on their backs that our agriculture and army maintains itself. They are DIFFERENT from you yes, but they ARE NOT WORSE simply because their ideas are different from yours. They won through their majority vote. It was done fairly, through that system that you implicitly agree with by participating in the process.(if you haven't seen section 2 by now you should read it)
2. I Hate you for thinking you're going to change things. Very recently, in fact only a day or two after the election, I talked to a few people about their apparent outrage at the whole election process, many of whom were very mad that Kerry lost. A few, on the other hand, just a few, were mad about the whole thing. They said that they're going to band together and make a difference, change things for the better, because they 'are sick and tired of it.' HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. OH YEAH YOU"RE SICK AND TIRED OF IT. Let me drum something into your little concrete mind, liberal; you will make no difference. You will change nothing. Barring the obvious point of, you lost the election, the majority of America stands on the other end of the fence, and you have no chance of swaying them while they're in power because they are just as bull-headed as you...SLOGANS, AD CAMPAIGNS AND ALL THE BOYCOTTING IN THE WORLD GET YOU JACK FUCKING SHIT. You say you're going to organize, you're going to fight back. I would simply ask...with what? You really think that by utilizing the system, you're going to be able to change it? That by VOTING, your instant orgasm word, that everything will be hunkydorey? Somehow, if you fight those 'stinking conservatives' on their own turf, get people informed, get them voting for democrats, that you're going to reverse all the horrible things that have happened and point us in a new and glorious direction? WHAT!?!?!? YOU MEAN TO SAY THAT THROUGH YOUR CAREFUL PLACEMENT OF THE RIGHT PEOPLE IN GOVERNMENT YOU"RE GOING TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE. LET ME BREAK THIS DOWN FOR YOU. NO ONE IS GOING TO LISTEN TO YOU. Some of the individuals you love and that support your views may make it to office, hell they may even try to change things, but as the government has proven on so many occasions, if you throw enough money at something, it goes away. Politicians are put in positions of extreme power, facing ridiculous corruption every day. They will buckle. If they don't, they'll be ruined socially or economically by the media (don't even get me started on how the media is an extension of governmental oppression), or by their peers, those that are supported by the current administrative system. You want to make a difference? You want to make people turn their heads and realize that maybe what's going on is actually making you mad, making you outraged, sending us all down the shithole? I have a little suggestion for you. Build a bomb. Buy a gun. You cannot build this utopic vision of yours (def see section 3) without first tearing down the existing schemata. Trying to work within this system's bounds merely serves to reinforce its credibility and capability to harm you and what you stand for. I can guarantee if you murder someone's family or burn down a treasured political landmark, people will start to take notice that 'hey maybe things aren't really going all that well, maybe people really are mad about all this nonsense that's happening. Until you do this, no one is going to give a shit how many rallies you have, how many leaflets you distribute, or how many benefit concerts you have, you stupid repugnant neo-hippy. Give peace a chance is just another way of saying please shit in my mouth el presidente, I love how it tastes when it's mixed with blood and regret.
3. I hate that you think you're better than everyone else. Yes, in case you want to know, I do hate conservatives. I think that they are bullheaded dogmatic heels. I don't agree with nearly any of the things that they stand for. They deal in oppression and lies, with an iron fist and well polished boot. But you, YOU have the audacity to follow them perfectly in propagandistic tendency. Yes, they may believe they have god on their side, they may represent old white people, they may be the most flagrant in their hatred for what they despise, but YOU are exactly the same. Only instead of god, you have this nameless 'right' on your side. You do what's right, what's good, what will ensure happiness for the most people. Let's look at just one situation where this is the most flagrant asshole tendency. Abortion. Yes, right-wing people want to get rid of it completely, yes, this will mean horrible lives and deaths for an enormous number of women and is frankly, disgusting murder. (ed note. i am in full support of abortion) You are pro-abortion, you want to save the lives of all of these women, because their lives are important, and you cannot deny them the right to have control of their lives. HEREIN LIES THE BULLSHIT--YOU JUSTIFY THIS BY SAYING THAT THE CHILD WITHIN THIS MOTHER IS NOT REALLY A PERSON YET, SO IT IS OK TO KILL IT, ESPECIALLY WHEN IT COMES TO SAVING THE WOMAN"S LIFE. And on some level, I will concede that I agree with you. BUT, the child is still a living thing. WHICH PUTS YOU IN KIND OF A SHITTY SITUATION DOESN"T IT VEGETARIAN/VEGAN/ANIMAL RIGHTS ACTIVIST?? YOU"D NEVER KILL AN ANIMAL, BECAUSE THEY SHOULD HAVE AS MANY RIGHTS AS WE DO. BUT YOU"LL TURN AROUND AND KILL A HUMAN CHILD YOU HYPOCRITICAL HUNK OF TRASH. THE FOETUS MAY INDEED NOT BE A PERSON, BUT WE CAN CERTAINLY CONCEDE THAT IT IS AN ANIMAL. SO NEXT TIME YOU GO THE THE CLINIC AFTER FUCKING YOUR HIPPY BOYFRIEND AND YOU WANT THEM TO JAM A COATHANGER UP THERE AND MURDER YOUR CHILD, REMEMBER THAT IT'S AN ANIMAL TOO. I'm sorry, I'm not being 'politically correct' I'm not applying the liberal stricture of treating everyone with dignity and respect. You expect everyone to love everyone else, don't you, liberal? In fact, you want to impose this sense of equality and love on others. You want a forced equality, you want everyone to get along because that's what's right. (Keep in mind I am in no way supporting any kind of prejudice here) WHAT YOU THINK IS RIGHT YOU MEAN. YOUR OWN IMPOSED FASCISM, ONLY THIS TIME IT HAS A SMILEY FACE ON IT. Imposing a righteous judgement of 'not eating animals' or 'loving everyone's sexuality/race/ethnicity/gender/religion is an IMPOSITION on the ideas and feelings of others. Surely, I agree that people should love one another, but in no case, would I go as far to say that someone is WRONG for not feeling this way. I may not agree with them, but TO DENY THEM THE AUTONOMY TO MAKE THAT DECISION THEMSELVES IS THE LARGEST CRIME OF ALL. IMPOSED LOVE IS NO LOVE AT ALL. You remember Orwell's novel 1984, oh wait, of course you do, you have it sitting next to the bed where you keep the vaseline and the dildos. I'd hate to break it to you.....liberal, but that book is not about fascism. It's about the system going too far to the left, while still remaining a system. IT IS A LEFT-WING UTOPIAN VISION. IT IS IMPOSED ORDER. IT IS IMPOSED LOVE. IT IS IMPOSED HAPPINESS. IT IS IMPOSED THOUGHT. Do us all a favor, realize that opinions other than yours have necessary validity simply because they exist as opinions, as part of an idea and feeling coming from another thinking and acting being. It is different, no better, and no worse.
Ok, I'm starting to run out of steam...so I'll stop for now.
Subsume and Lick!
24 Comments
Reader Comments (24)
Yeah, I wanted Kerry, yeah, I voted for Kerry, and yeah, Kerry is a turd-sandwich. We're dealing with the armageddon principle here. Bush is a penis-in-the-eye because, after all, he lied (taking a course of action when you know it isn't supported by any real evidence is just as bad as telling an upfront lie) to the american people and got us into a war costing hundreds of thousands of lives (I'm counting Iraqis here because they are, contrairy to some polls, people). Now, you are surprised, why wasn't he impeached when all Clinton did was sleep around a bit with a fat chick? COULD IT BE BECAUSE OF THE REPUBLICAN PARTY IS THE DOMINANT FORCE IN CONGRESS? Yes, as a matter of fact it was. Go figure that the 'moral majority' would be selectively moral.
Oh yeah and way to go Democrats, way to present your collective asses to Bush so he can plug you at his leisure. Ask anyone what Kerry believed in, ASK ANYONE, there was nothing, he had no platform at all, you could say he was an amporphous blob.....this brings me to my next point.
Of course we should have elected Kerry, he doesn't really talk about anything important, he is an amporphous blob who takes on the characteristics of whomever he is around......JOHN KERRY IS KIRBY! Yes that is correct, everyone's favorate Warp Star Knight came all the way from the fountion of dreams to battle Bush, and we let him down.
We fucked up bad America.
We fucked up bad.
For the record, the most common argument of pro-choicers (though one I think is kind of silly) is that the fetus is nothing but a pile of bio-mass oozing itself together, and thus not a life form, let alone an animal. I think it can count for life about as much as an animal, but I'm the only jerk I know who believes that.
And Gc, I'm not fooled by your animal-lover hating remarks. We both know you've spent nights running around the road chasing frogs off of it so they won't get hurt. It's true, I seen it!
I'm glad everyone has something to say, even if they don't agree with me...because that's what freedom is about...authoritarian liberal scum!
(I know I can't spell, blasphamy, blah blah blah) budda and confusious even had an idea that they had not yet figured themselves out, and that thats what they needed to work on. stupid liberal, stupid conservatives, stupid human race...
Thanks for the IM, most amusing. I agree. Humans are stupid. Kerry wouldn't necessarilly have been much better than Bush, even if I did vote for him. I live in a Republican state. (Virginia) I had no illusions that my vote would make _any difference at all_ but I voted anyway like a good little marionette. I fucking did my part, and yes it's a shame that the moral majority lacks brains, or the ability to shit (according to you, nice imagery btw) but that's not my fault. Yes, their oppinions are different from mine. Yes, I think that people who "disagree with Bush's policy" yet vote for him, simply because he's a republican and a born again chirstian, are idiots. Yes, we all have some responsibility for the way that this "democracy" is going, yes, Bush fairly won the election, but that _doesn't mean I have to like it_.
Hanna got a crick in her neck leaning over me and laughing hystarically. She approves of your post.
All in all, I think one innocuous away message that deplores the state of humanity (all humanity, not just conservatives) is not too bad. We all become hidebound, censurious, and idiotic. It's a state that all humans progress to.
I'm not killing people yet. Maybe that's a little self-riteous of me, but whatever. And no, my oppinion doesn't matter more, it's just mine, so I know a lot more about it. I also have no compunctions that I'm going to change things.
As to abortion, I'm not sure what would happen if I got pregnant. Yes, it's an animal, and yes, it's a human. Maybe i'd be content to be a murderer, maybe not. All the same, when something's inside of someone else's body, i'm not going to tell them what to do with it. It may be an animal, even a human animal, but until it's viable outside the womb, it has tumor status. It's something that feeds off a human body, that the body must force itself not to kill. Sometimes this doens't work, and we have spontaneous abortions. Whatever, it's the other person's body, and if they want to kill something that's fucking eating them, fine. Not my place to tell them no. Call me a "bleeding" liberal.
I'm not sure whether or not you were counting me as a liberal, in any event, whatever. I'm stuborn enough, and angry enough, to hate pretty much everyone. Just like you. I always remember how Hanna could never really understand that.
Hugs,
Leslie (and Hanna for some of it)
Nate
P.S. Get a job. And not just Keith. All of you who are reading this right now and not working in a sweatshop or in an abortion clinic making me sweet, sweet candy. Get a job.
Grindcore has mastered this already. You should follow his example.
I thought I made it pretty clear. But for those of you who didn't get the joke. "Abortions are the main ingredient in Swedish Fish Candy." There you go. Voila.
Nate
Just a message for the kiddies though: It's all fun and games to joke about it, but seriously folks, the FDA strongly recommends against eating any fetus that has not been well cooked throughout. I can't tell you what to do with your body, but friends don't let friends eat raw children. It's not a game, it's your life.
Just don't forget to fry when you're done with the hanger"
Pry & Fry 2004
ps, nate is right, more abortion means more swedish fish. But why stop there? We could start aborting children like....seven or eight years into the pregnancy, that way they've had time to ripen with age!
As to Thanksgiving coming up, there is something called a tur-duck-en, its a duck stuffed into a chicken, stuffed into a turkey, and some pork stuffing as well, I have discovered a deliteful variation on this! A fetus, stuffed in a duck, stuffed in a turkey, with some pork stuffing, its called a tur-duck-us and it's just to kill for; if fact, you sorta have to. And with some minor sewing skills you can keep your tur-duck-us moist and juicy by placing it back in the placenta along with some womb juices and stitching it up like a roasting bag. This methode really allows you to taste the stem cells. Man after all this Grindcore should put a babdy recipe section up on his page, for the good of all babivores out there.