Today on IM I had this conversation with my sister that went essentially like this...

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH

KERIN:  Alright I better get back to my work.  I made these motivational signs for myself and posted them around the room, they help me work.
KEITH:  What do you mean, like 'oh god I need to work or I'll live the rest of my life getting mayonaise shot into my genitals for forty bucks a day?'
KERIN:  Uhhhhh more like "Stop fucking around and do your work you stupid slut...  Oh yeah and put down the candy biatch"
KEITH:  HAHAHAH OH GOD
KERIN:  Oh yeah and 'Do your work hoe-beast'
KEITH:  I got two words for you 'C'moooooooon'